Thursday, November 4, 2010

In which I reflect on my life's loves

Well, the day has taught me this: If I hadn't already found the loves of my life, I'd be in big trouble today. I apparently let something crawl up my ass this morning where it has only festered throughout the day. At present, this thing has left me feeling raw, vulnerable and on the verge of tears. I must say that this does seem like an improvement from several hours earlier when I was hit with the feeling that I would literally claw my co-workers eyes out if one more person asked me for one more thing.

Alas, I digress.

At the start of the day, I was prepared to look at everyone through the eyes of love This proved a bit out of my norm, as I work with 30 women and 2 men. Normally, I consider myself a hetero and not inclined towards romantic loving thoughts about my female work peeps. But this experiment being what it is, I set off in the name of science and tried to see them differently.The result? Yeah, no. I dont think I'm missing the love of my life boat there. Sure, some of the them have some lovely qualities. They make me laugh, they make me think. But they aren't making my jingle tingle.

Case Studies (names have been changed to protect the innocent):"Momma" Is a bit ditzy. Rockin' the same hair she did in 1984, which does make me love her a little. Also, has unabiding love for Steve Perry, lead singer of Journey. Also lovable.

The Bug Gun." Wears what can only be described as "fancy lite" to work every day. lovable. Not lovable? Her overwhelming desire to have things be fastidiously clean and overly twee.

"Comb Over." One of the 2 men. Lovable - he has a nickname for me and we talk about our kids every day. Not lovable -I have to gently remind him from time to time that he talks like a sexist pig.

And so in the midst of my shit ass attitude, I decided to reflect on those that I consider the loves of my life. I am supremely blessed. I mean, really. Really, really, really. I have oodles of people that love me and support me and cheerlead for me. I have people I can laugh with and cry with, get drunk and get into mid-level mischief with. I am blessed. And if nothing more, this assignment today has made me really think about that.Those that know me IRL know that I have been dealing with lots of upheaval and stupid family drama lately. I think today's assignment was just what I needed to make me step back and appreciate the people I do have, instead of focusing on their shortcomings. So despite the bug that killed my buzz, I think today's been a good one.


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